Life is what you make it
by LadyKryptonite294
Summary: AU. Chloe has been diagnosed with cancer and it follows her having to find the words to tell Clark that she is dying.
1. News

**Title:** Life is what you make it

**Rating:** T

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt

**Pairing:** Chloe/Clark, slight Chloe/Jimmy (one-shot for the story).

**Author notes:** Hey…this was a _'what if _' idea I had, involving Clark and Chloe, and how life and perspectives would change when constants are broken…so be kind and please let me know what you think, comments are always welcomed…_just not too harsh_ :D

**Summary:** AU. Chloe has been diagnosed with cancer and it follows her having to find the words to tell Clark that she is dying.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the Smallville/Superman characters or worlds…unfortunately, what I wouldn't give to own Clark _sigh_…

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Life is what you make it 

Jimmy pulled up outside of an all very familiar place, the Kent farm. A place he had driven to many times before and no doubt this wouldn't be last time. However the reason for this visit wasn't one of particularly happy circumstances. Once parked, he stopped the car and turned to look at his wife.

"Are you sure you want to do this now, because we can come back another time an-"Jimmy stressed, his words being cut short by Chloe's interruption.

"No I have to do this, I have to get it over with…thank you Jimmy" Chloe replied taking her hand and placing it over her husbands, tightly squeezing it trying to reassure herself more than Jimmy.

Chloe kissed Jimmy on the cheek and stepped out of the car, before she took another step she paused and looked up towards the infamous Clark Kent barn, or as Clark and herself liked to call it, the fortress of solitude. Where many years ago, she most certainly would have found Clark brooding or plotting another plan to impress and earn Lana's undivided attention and love. Chloe chuckled slightly to herself remembering how Clark would ramble on and on about how much he loved Lana Lang and how it hurt him that she wouldn't notice him, then she was suddenly pained at the thought of her own feelings. It was so long since they were that age, yet one thing hadn't changed, her love for Clark Kent. She constantly reminds herself of her love for her husband Jimmy Olsen, and she did love him, just not as she had and still loved Clark.

How times had changed since then…how life had become so much more complicated. Thing weren't as simple as they were back then, there were now more things to worry about other than who will be taking who to the prom or who has been infected by the meteor rocks this week. Chloe couldn't believe that all of this was over 20 years ago, it felt like another life time, yet all of the good and bad memories were fresh in her mind and she couldn't quite let go of her youthful years. But she was grateful for the years which followed; she now had her lovely husband Jimmy and their twin girls Claira and Lara to make it all worth it, but Clark and Superman would always be a large part of her life. Life had much more complications attached as adults, and yet still life had never been simpler.

"Chloe? Are you ok?" Jimmy asked lovingly when he noticed Chloe hadn't moved from the same spot for several minutes.

"Yep…I…I'm fine, you should go and pick up the girls from school, I can get a lift back from Clark if that's ok…I don't know how long this is going to take, love you" Chloe spurted out after being broke from her trance of deep thought.

"Ok hunny, see you at home"

"Oh and Jimmy…don't tell the girls just yet…I don't want them to worry" Chloe asked quietly

"Ok, what ever you want hunny, I love you too…bye" Jimmy called out of the window as he backed up the driveway and headed back to their apartment in Metropolis.

Chloe eventually mustered enough courage to make her way up to the front door, she paused before knocking…did she really want to do this? Did she really want to tell Clark something that could change the way he looked at her, treated her? She stopped herself short and reminded herself that no matter what she told him that he could never disown her or treat her any differently, because she was still the same old Chloe Sullivan…well Chloe Olsen now but any way the point was she trusted Clark to accept the news and help her no matter what.

She knocked on the door and waited until she heard bustling from the inside and then Martha Kent opened the door pleasantly surprised to see Chloe.

"Chloe…come in, please, what brings you all the way back to Smallville?" Martha pleasantly asked, motioning Chloe into the living room and onto the sofa. This is what Chloe had always loved about Martha, she would always make you feel welcome what ever time of day, in many ways she always mothered Chloe and gave her the love she had never received from her own mother, partly because her real mother wasn't around for the majority of her life.

"Well actually I was looking for Clark…I have something to tell him. Do you know when he is getting off work today?" Chloe asked trying to mask the distress in her voice.

"Oh well…I…I don't know anymore Chloe, working at the Daily Planet doesn't exactly come with reasonable hours as you know. You are welcome to wait here for him; he said he would be popping over later to help out with the farm duties"

"That would be great thank you" Chloe said some what disappointed that Clark wasn't already there; it now meant she had to build up her courage all over again to tell him the news when he finally arrived.

"Now, where are my manners, would you like a cup of tea?" Martha offered standing as she pointed towards the kitchen.

"That would be lovely, I'll give you a hand" Chloe stood thankful for something to take her mind off of the situation.

8888

An hour later Clark arrived at the farm and was surprised to find Chloe sitting at the kitchen table with his mother.

"Chloe? What are you doing here?" Clark asked placing his coat and brief case onto the table, he quickly walked over to sit besides his best friend and Chloe was immediately melted away with just one glance of his baby blue eyes…then she remembered why she was here.

"Hey, Clark…actually I need to talk to you…" Chloe looked to the floor trying to fight back the tears that were forming behind her eyes. Clark must have noticed her reaction and he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close him.

"Chloe what is it?"

"Can we go somewhere private…I'm sorry Martha I…I just really need to talk to Clark alone" Chloe said hating to be leaving Martha out, but this really was something that she needed to talk to Clark about.

"Yer sure we can" Clark stood and walked with Chloe to the barn and she was relieved when she could collapse onto the sofa, pulling her feet up and lying flat out she threw her hands over her face.

"Chloe what is it, what do you need to tell me?" Clark probed being cautious not to upset her anymore than she obviously was.

"Oh Clark…" Chloe sighed sitting back up and looking to the floor not wanting to make eye contact with him, scared that she would fall to pieces entirely.

Clark sat besides her and touched her forearm reassuring her that he was here and would listen to what ever she had to say.

"Chlo what's wrong" Clark said with more feeling this time starting to become scared as to what her news was going to be.

"No…I'm sure you have more important things to do, like save the world or something" Chloe remarked anguish in her voice, trying dearly to stall the conversation for as long as possible.

"Chloe, nothing is more important to me at this time than you, no what's wrong?" Clark answered completely serious looking Chloe straight in the eye challenging her to refuse his answer.

"…I went to the hospital this morning…I fainted last night and Jimmy was worried and…" Chloe couldn't say the words, her heart was pounding, she was so scared, she some how felt by saying it all out loud made it more real and she didn't want it to be.

"It's ok I'm here Chlo, what is it?"

"Well they done all kinds of tests and…and…I have cancer Clark" Chloe chocked out now completely lost in her whirl wind of emotions, the tears she had fought so hard to push back fell without hesitation and she collapsed into Clarks arms sobbing uncontrollably as he embraced her violently shaking petite frame in his arms.

"Chloe…" Clark was lost for words, he found himself lost in the same emotional void as his best friend, he sat comforting her, tears running down his cheeks, but he wouldn't allow her to see them, he had to be strong for Chloe, what use was being the man if steel, if I can't protect the ones I love Clark thought to himself angry that he couldn't do anything to help her.

They stayed entwined in each others arms for what seemed like hours, time didn't matter at the moment. All Chloe knew was that she needed Clark to help her and she knew that he would.

"Chloe…" Clark was the first to break the silence with a croaky voice. He needed to know more; he needed to understand what it all meant.

"Chloe? How bad is it?" He hated himself for asking her this now more than ever, but he had to know.

"Erm…" Chloe took a moment to compose her self and slightly sat herself upright to face Clark. "They said that I will be undergoing treatments, but they don't know if it will help…the caner cells are too aggressive…Clark…it's terminal" Chloe almost whispered out her last words as she lost herself again to her ever demanding emotions.

Clark didn't know what was going to happen from now on, but he knew one thing for sure, he wasn't going to abandon Chloe, he would stand by her no matter what and help her through this traumatic time. He merely sat holding her in his arms, comforting her the only way he could right now, being there for her.

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**Well...What do you think? i hope you liked it :D...Please leave a comment...they're always welcome :D**


	2. Goodbye

He spent the next three years watching Chloe slowly weaken and frail more and more each day…he hated it, he felt so guilty that he dreaded going to visit her at the hospital, but he always did, he always showed…for Chloe

He spent the next three years watching Chloe slowly weaken and frail more and more each day…he hated it, he felt so guilty that he dreaded going to visit her at the hospital, but he always did, he always showed…for Chloe.

It wasn't long after that, when things took a tragic turn, she had a mild stroke and was only just revived at the last minute…_Is that what she really would have wanted_ Clark often finds himself thinking, as he recalls the nothingness that was a life which Chloe was forced to live. But he still turned up and still sat watching his best friend sleep. Constantly reminded at what this unjustified illness took from her…deprived her from…a life.

To Clark she was the woman who lived life to the fullest and always took things in her stride…he thought back to when she would drag him along on her crazy investigations, saying _Life is what you make it Clark_…he always complained, but secretly he didn't mind…he enjoyed sharing these adventures with his best friend and the woman he would gradually learn to love…just not in time.

He managed to spend one last perfect evening with her the night before she finally passed away. She had asked him to take her flying one last time…in a strange way he thinks she knew that day would be the last time they would ever be able to see one another. It was that night that he finally decided to tell her how he felt…he knew that especially after all this time it would mean nothing…but she still managed to surprise him…she let him in on a secret…she still loved him too.

So now as he stands watching her casket be lowered into the ground…now completely out of view, her words from that night still rang in his mind…_For a Superman you never were that good at timing_…he felt hot tears course down his cheeks, he swore that he felt them burn, but he knew he must be imagining things because nothing could burn his skin…but he felt it…the pain…the regret.

A song played in the background, but he couldn't hear it…it was nothing more than a disturbance in the distance, something that was keeping him from hearing Chloe…he stood listening for her heartbeat, for something to sound from the coffin, like the time he heard her in the morgue…but he heard nothing…only silence.

He looked up to see Jimmy, his face as drooped as his own. Stood either side of him, was their twin girls Claira and Lara…two girls that meant the world to their mother Chloe and their father Jimmy. Two special girls that Clark swore to look out for…once Chloe…

He chocked back a sob as it rose in his throat, thinking how Chloe will never be able to watch her girls grow up and live the fullest life as she would have had. Before he could fall deeper into his own thoughts and cut himself completely from reality…he felt a small, cold hand slip into his larger one, the contact sending shivers down his spine…yet the support he felt when the trembling fingers clutched tighter as he felt it's owner shake through tears, was enough to draw from his mind and survive this tragic ordeal.

He continued to listen to the Priest speak, not once looking to see who still stood grasping his hand as though their life depended on it as much as his did.

It wasn't until everyone began to walk away that he built the courage to look beside him and face the one person that gave him the strength to see this through…as he slowly turned to face this person he was shocked to find that they were no longer by his side…his heart missed a beat as his head shot up and looked off into the distance, far beyond the masses of people dispersing…then he saw her…a blonde woman walking with her back to him…her figure fading into the sunset.

"Thank you Chloe" was all Clark managed to say in a rasped voice, as he joined the others on their way back home…feeling sure that Chloe would always be around to help him…knowing that they had shared the love of a lifetime together…feeling forgiven.

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**Well...What do you think? i hope you liked it :D...Please leave a comment...they're always welcome :D**


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